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Saturday, July 23, 2011

My 100th Post

When I was fundraising and training for my third marathon (second Boston) in 2009, someone I was close to at the time suggested that I create a blog on the web to spread the word and generate interest.  Oh, and to provide a medium in which I could beg and plead for your spare change.

I never said I didn't possess a flair for the dramatic.

On January 27, 2009, I wrote my first post.  That was two years, five months and 26 days ago.  When I last updated my blog on July 14, I realized that was my 99th entry.

Next up?  The big 100.

What would I say?  How would I commemorate this special occasion?  Should I just treat it like any other post and wax poetic on the topic du jour?

I almost thought about assembling a retrospective of my own personal favorite posts in one entry.  Kind of like "Cyndi Springford's Top Ten Rambles...Rants...Rebuilds and Runs".  After all, don't some television shows do a "best of" to celebrate their 100th episode?  So, I thought about it, but decided not to.  It just seemed a little recycled (I have a thing for "r" words) and unimaginative.
Instead, I chose to share with you how I (and life in general, really) have changed since I first put my metaphorical pen to paper.  In keeping with the true spirit of this blog, these observations of mine are in no particular order of importance:

  • I guess the most obvious change is that I finally got my BQ in May of 2010.  I can now say that I have run the Boston Marathon as a qualified runner.  I had invested so much angst, anxiety, energy and time in that aspiration.  It just goes to show that the expression, "it's not the kill; it's the thrill of the chase" is true, for me, at least.  I still love to run and I will probably always run 1-2 marathons a year, but if I never do Boston again, it's okay with me.  I intend to get better and better with every footstrike, but I'm not hard over on doing it again.  Been there, done that.  :-)
  • I feel much better about myself.  There has been a certain love/hate relationship with my body over the years and I'm more at peace with it now than I have ever been.  Some of that may be due to aging, but it doesn't really matter how or why it happened.  I love the body I was born with:  the long, thick, naturally lustrous hair, my infectious laugh, calves that could kickstart a Harley...well.  I could go on.  And that's the best part.
  • I think I'm starting to "get" what life is all about.  At the age of 37, I was still experiencing growing pains of a sort.  There were still painful parts of my personality that I hadn't acknowledged and made peace with.  I had moments of anger, envy, frustration, and overwhelment that I wasn't sure how to handle.  Now that I have a better understanding of what our emotions are and what they're meant to tell us, I can take it as face value and use my current mood to bring me to a more peaceful, serene and balanced state of well being.  
  • I am learning how to let go of things, whether they be of a material or nonphysical nature.  This is a work in process, but I'm looking forward to figuring it out.  I can visualize a clear, uncluttered environment a lot easier now than I ever could before.  I am also giving myself permission to take as much time as is necessary.  I am not imposing limits on myself.  I am setting myself free from expectations.  
  • I have completed seven marathons and am currently training for my eighth.  I am most focused on enjoying the training, taking it one day at a time, and looking forward to visiting a new city.  Training for a marathon is a big commitment and it takes lots of time, but it doesn't have to be drudgery, nor should it be.  No one is holding a gun to my head and making me do this.  It's my choice.  If I'm going to take on a 26.2 mile run, I might as well make it as fun and meaningful as I can.  
  • I'm staring down the barrel of turning 40.  It doesn't seem to phase me at all.  I don't know what 40 is supposed to look like.  I've seen 40 year olds who look 25 while others look 55.  It's really just a number.  I can say that with a reasonable amount of sincerity.  When I entered my 30's, I couldn't say it with a straight face.  Instead of lamenting that I'm not a twenty (and soon to be thirty) something anymore, I'm celebrating a new decade.  Did you know that women reach their sexual peak in their 40's?  Just thought I'd throw that one in to see if you were still paying attention.
  • And finally, the blog itself.  I had one follower in January 2009.  I now have 15.  People in the United States, United Kingdom, Canada and Brazil have viewed my page.  I created a folder in my inbox titled "positive feedback".  Whenever someone sends me a note about how what I wrote resonated with them in a strong way, I save it.  And there are days, where I really need to immerse myself in all that flattery and praise.  It makes me feel good to know that people enjoy what and how I write.  I take a lot of pride in that.
In closing, let me say thank you to everyone who has contributed in some way.  Maybe you starred in one of my stories, like Christine, John and Ted or perhaps you are a frequent commenter who cares and genuinely looks forward to the next post, and the next, and the next.  It's been fun and therapeutic for me to communicate in this way and I'm happy to see it's taken off.  I look forward to creating another 100 posts and connecting with more people all around the world. 

"We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures." -- Thornton Wilder

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